Community
Learning to Stop Hiding and Start Doing Life Together

Paul Durbin • Lead Pastor
November 6, 2026

6 Minute Read

This is our first real working meeting. We'll share where life's been since Kickoff, your mentor will tell his full faith story, we'll recite our memory verses, and we'll dig into the book and homework on community. Here's how to prepare and what to expect.

A quick word from Regi Campbell, the founder of Radical Mentoring, to set the tone:

"Intentionality, over time, leads to isolation."

Most of us don't drift into isolation on purpose. We just get busy being responsible — work, family, church, all the things — and before we know it, we're hiding in plain sight. This month is about turning that around.

Pre-Work

Come ready, and the meeting takes care of itself.

1. Read the Book

Read Bo's Café by John Lynch, Bill Thrall, and Bruce McNicol. Prepare a one-page net-out of your big ideas and key insights, and bring a copy for each man in the group. (See the Book Net-Out post if you need a refresher on how to put one together.)

Here’s a great line from that book: "None of us ever get fixed. But we can mature in community."

2. Memorize Two Verses

Be ready to recite both — keyword, chapter, and verse. We'll build on these every month.

3. Personal Assignment — Who Knows You Really?

Think through and write down your answers to these questions. Bring them with you.

  1. Do you have a plus one — one person who knows everything about you, from your darkest secrets to your greatest accomplishments? If not, why not?
  2. Do you have an inner circle — a group of people who will call to ask where you are when you don't show up? Who are they? If not, why not?
  3. Is it hard or easy for others to love on you? Why?
  4. If asked, "Are you lonely?" while taking a lie detector test, how would you answer
  5. What's holding you back from developing deeper community and more intimate relationships?
  6. In what ways are you really good at being a friend? Where do you struggle?
4. Additional Assignment

This one splits based on your season of life.

If you're married — Five Feet for Five Minutes.

  • Starting tomorrow, when you're done with work, go directly to within five feet of your wife and engage her for five minutes.
  • Ask about her day, her plans, what made her happy, what's weighing on her. Just listen — don't try to fix anything.
  • Don't check the mail. Don't even go for the kids first.
  • This is about voting her #1 with your physical presence in the first minutes you're back in her life.
  • Non-sexual touch is fair game.
  • Do it every day and be ready to report back.
  • Best not to tell her what you're doing — but don't be surprised if she figures it out. Keep going either way.

If you're single — Obituary.

Write the obituary you'd like to see after your death (of old age, by natural causes). Third person, two pages or less. Read a few online if you need to get the hang of it. Bring copies for every mentee and your mentor. Include:

  • Professional, community, church/ministry, and family accomplishments
  • Quotes from three important people in your life
  • A paragraph that opens: "In ___, he participated in a mentoring group. It was significant because…"
5. Growth Partner

Get together with your assigned growth partner before the meeting — coffee, breakfast, lunch, whatever works. Here's what to talk about:

  • If you're married: How did Five Feet for Five Minutes go? How did your wife respond? Can you keep it going?
  • If you're single: Does engaging in community come naturally to you, or is it hard? Why do you think that is?
  • Both of you: "Is it hard or easy for others to love on you?" and "If asked, 'Are you lonely?' on a lie detector test, how would you answer?"
6. Pray

Keep praying for your mentor and each man in the group. Ask God to reveal more of Himself to you through this season — and to help you grasp the value of having a band of brothers to do life with.

Agenda

Plan on about three hours.

Regroup & Prayer (15 minutes)

Quick catch-up on what's been going on in life since Kickoff, one thing you're hoping to get out of this season, and what God's teaching you right now. Then your mentor will open in prayer.

Mentor's Faith Story (45 minutes)

This is one of the most important moments of the whole year. Your mentor will tell his full story — the real version, not the Sunday School one. Listen well. Next month, at the Story Retreat, it's your turn.

Scripture Review (15 minutes)

Everyone recites Proverbs 27:17 and Philippians 2:4 — keyword, chapter, and verse.

Break (10 minutes)
Homework Debrief (40 minutes)

Walk through Who Knows You Really? together, then share from Five Feet for Five Minutes (married) or the Obituary (single).

Book Discussion (40 minutes)

Pass out your Bo's Café net-outs. Each man shares a fresh idea from the book, so we're building on each other instead of repeating the same takeaways.

Next Month Preview (5 minutes)

Mentor hands out next month's homework and growth partner pairings.

Closing Prayer (5 minutes)

Mentor prays for each man by name.

Look Ahead

Next month is our Story Retreat — a 24-hour overnight where each mentee tells his faith story. Your mentor will cover logistics separately. Here's what to prep:

Book
Verses
Personal Assignments
  • Choose to Lose — identify something you need to let go of in order to grow.
  • Words That Describe Me — a short exercise naming the words (good and bad) that honestly describe who you are.
  • What Lies Are You Believing? (singles only) — name the lies you've internalized about yourself, God, or life, and the truth that counters each one.
Prepare Your Faith Story
  • Start working on your own faith story now so you're ready to share it on the retreat.
  • This Telling Your Faith Story post will help you shape it.
Growth Partner
  • New pairing for the month.
  • Get together before the retreat.
Pray

Keep praying — for your mentor, each man in the group, and for God to do something you'll remember for the rest of your life on the Story Retreat.

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Radical Mentoring

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Up Next
From this Author: Paul Durbin
November 10, 2026 • 2 Minute Read
The Ransom You Could Never Afford
Imagine standing in a Nigerian village, your daughter gone, your savings nowhere near enough, and the people who took her nowhere you can reach. That was the reality for the families of the Chibok girls. And honestly, it's the picture the Bible paints of every single one of us without Christ. We don't like to think of ourselves as captives. We like to think we're resourceful. If something's broken, we fix it. If we owe something, we pay it off. If we're stuck in a contract, we hire a lawyer and find the loophole. But the psalmist says something that stops us in our tracks: "No one can redeem the life of another or give to God a ransom for them. The ransom for a life is costly, no payment is ever enough" (Psalm 49:7-8). No payment is ever enough. Not your best effort. Not your church attendance. Not your clean record or your messy apology. The captors—sin and the enemy—are simply too strong for you. And here's the good news: they were never too strong for Jesus. He didn't just drop off the ransom from a safe distance. He walked all the way in. He became the payment. Not because you deserved it, but because He loved you. So today, stop trying to afford something that's already been bought.ransom

Paul Durbin

Lead Pastor

November 10, 2026 • 7 Minute Read
Who's Paying Your Ransom?
OVERVIEW 👀 In this opening message of the Thankful for the Cross series, Pastor Paul Durbin walks us through the first of four reasons we can be deeply thankful Jesus went to the cross—He paid our ransom. Using the heartbreaking story of the Chibok girls taken by Boko Haram, Paul paints a vivid picture of what captivity really looks like and why no personal payment is ever enough to set us free. He unpacks five realities every Belay'er needs to grasp: without Christ we are captives, no personal payment is sufficient, Jesus Himself became our ransom, love for the captive (not the captor) drove the payment, and we must choose to walk free. This message is a warm, honest invitation to stop loving our captivity and start walking in the freedom Jesus already purchased.ransom TIPS 📌 For the greatest impact, invite a few others to go through this study guide with you. You don't need to do every section and question—use what fits your group or season. Let the Spirit highlight where to slow down and engage. ICEBREAKER(S) 🧊 Who in a movie or book do you think makes the best rescuer, and what makes their rescue so satisfying? BIBLE PASSAGE(S) 📖 Matthew 20:28 1 Timothy 2:5-6 Romans 7:18-19 Luke 4:18 OBSERVATION 🔎 In 1 Timothy 2:5-6, how does Paul describe both the role of Jesus and the scope of who the ransom is for? Read Romans 7:18-19. What specific words does Paul use to describe his inner struggle, and what does that reveal about the nature of captivity to sin? In Luke 4:18, what are the specific things Jesus says He was anointed and sent to do? APPLICATION 👋 Paul described being "captive" to sin as feeling like a habit you don't want, an addiction you can't shake, or a bitterness that's eating you alive. Where in your life right now does captivity feel most real? Think about how our culture tells us we can fix almost anything by trying harder, paying more, or finding a loophole. How has that mindset shaped the way you think about your own spiritual life? Paul said some of the Chibok girls stayed behind because they had grown accustomed to captivity. Are there areas in your life where you've grown so used to captivity that freedom actually feels uncomfortable? The sermon pointed out that one reason people doubt the devil is a very real strategy to keep us captive. How seriously do you take the idea of a personal spiritual enemy, and how does that affect your daily choices? Paul emphasized that Jesus didn't just pay the ransom, He became the ransom. How does that distinction change the way you view the cross and your relationship with Jesus? The sermon said the ransom wasn't paid out of respect for the captor, but out of love for the captive. What would shift in your life if you really believed God paid that price specifically out of love for you? Paul invited anyone who felt stirred to pray a prayer of receiving Jesus as their ransom. Was there anything in that moment that stirred in you, and what might your next step look like? LIVE ON BELAY 🏔️ Reach out this week to someone you know is stuck in something hard—an addiction, grief, anxiety, bitterness—and simply listen without trying to fix them. Remind them they're not alone. Share the story of the Chibok girls and the ransom with a friend or coworker who doesn't follow Jesus, and use it as a doorway to talk about what Jesus did on the cross. Identify one "captivity" in your own life this week—a habit, mindset, or relationship pattern—and tell a trusted Belay'er about it so you can walk toward freedom together. Write a short note or text to someone who recently made a decision to follow Jesus, encouraging them that the price has been paid and they really are free. Spend one evening this week unplugged from screens and in prayer, specifically thanking Jesus for being your ransom and asking Him to show you anyone else who needs to hear that good news. PRAYER 🙏 Thank Jesus for not just paying your ransom, but becoming your ransom. Ask the Holy Spirit to show you any area where you've grown comfortable with captivity, and give you courage to walk free. Pray for someone you love who's still captive to sin, addiction, or deception—that their eyes would be opened. Ask God for a deeper awareness of the enemy's schemes so you're not outwitted by sin or temptation this week. Pray that Belay would be a community where captives find freedom and the ransomed know they are deeply loved. WORSHIP 🙌 OUTLINE 📝 Main Idea: Jesus didn't just pay our ransom on the cross—He became the ransom payment itself, out of pure love for us, the captives. Opening Illustration: The 2014 kidnapping of 276 girls in Chibok, Nigeria by Boko Haram, and the estimated $3.7 million ransom allegedly paid to secure the release of most of the girls. The terrorists didn't deserve the money—but the girls were loved. Series Setup: Thankful for the Cross—a four-week series answering why we should be deeply thankful Jesus went to the cross. The four reasons: Jesus paid our ransom, Jesus became our king, Jesus took our punishment, Jesus gives us an example. Today's focus: Jesus paid our ransom. Defining Ransom: A sum of money or payment demanded or paid for the release of a captive. Historical note: The ransom view was the dominant way of describing the cross for the first thousand years of Christianity (Origen, Gregory, Augustine). Without Christ, we are captives. Captive to sin (Romans 7:18-19, Acts 8:23). Captive to the devil, who is a very real captor (John 8:44, 2 Timothy 2:26, 1 Peter 5:8). Denying the devil's reality makes his deception easier (2 Corinthians 2:10-11). No personal payment is sufficient. Our culture says try harder, pay more, find a loophole—but that doesn't work spiritually. Psalm 49:7-8: no one can redeem the life of another. Our captors are simply too strong for us, just like the Chibok parents couldn't storm a terrorist compound. Jesus became our ransom. He didn't just pay the price—He was the price (1 Peter 1:18-19, Hebrews 10:5-10). Illustration: The alleged mediators and Swiss diplomats who drove into the Nigerian forest with duffel bags of euros, risking their lives. Deeper illustration: Aslan in The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe—the willing victim on the stone table, and the "deeper magic" that predates the law. It's love for the captives, not respect for the captor, that prompted the ransom. The ransom wasn't paid because the terrorists were loved—it was paid because the girls were loved. John 3:16-17: God so loved the world. Ephesians 2:1-5: because of His great love for us, God made us alive with Christ. We must choose to walk free. Roughly 80-90 of the Chibok girls stayed behind—not because the ransom wasn't paid, but because they'd grown accustomed to captivity. We too can fall in love with our sin, our image, our old way of life. Luke 4:18: Jesus came to proclaim liberty to the captives and recovery of sight to the blind. Takeaway: If the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed (John 8:36)—so stop loving your captivity and walk out of the compound.

Paul Durbin

Lead Pastor

November 6, 2026 • 5 Minute Read
Telling Your Faith Story
Most of us have given a testimony at some point. Usually it follows Paul's pattern in front of King Agrippa — life before Jesus, how I came to Jesus, life since. Nice and neat. Radical Mentoring asks for more. You're sharing your whole story — the good, the bad, and the ugly — so the group can actually see the journey God's had you on. This is how to put that together. Mentors go first. At the Community meeting, your mentor told his full story and set the bar for transparency. At the Story Retreat, each mentee takes a turn. What the mentor modeled is what the group will deliver (so mentors, go deep, and mentees, follow the lead). A couple of reminders before you start: Be real. Transparent and vulnerable beats polished every time. God gets the glory. Don't try to make it look like He didn't have much work to do. The group rises and falls on honesty. This process doesn't work if we keep up appearances. Step 1. Draw Your Lifeline Grab a piece of paper and draw a horizontal line across it. Divide the line into sections — one per decade of your life (0–10, 11–20, 21–30, and so on). Then ask God to bring to mind the critical events of each decade — turning points, moments of truth, disasters, failures, victories, the things that shaped who you are. Mark positive events above the line. Mark negative events below the line. Note your age at each one. Here's a sample list from the Radical Mentoring guide: My dad abandoned our family. My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. I met Mary, my future wife. Mary left me. I surrendered my life to Jesus. I was baptized. If you end up with more than a dozen points, cross out the ones that aren't essential to your faith journey. Step 2. Add the God Part Next to each event, write where God was in that moment. Be honest. For the highs: Did you see His hand at the time? When did you start to see how He was loving, blessing, or protecting you? If you still can't see Him in one, it's okay — say so. For the lows: What did He teach you? How did He redeem the situation? These moments of disruption are often where the biggest learning and growth happen — and the group will probably learn more from how you got through the down times than to your victories. Here's how that might look using the sample above: Event: My dad abandoned our family. God: I didn't know God then. I felt alone, abandoned, unloved. Event: My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. God: II thought, “If there is a God, how could He be good?” I turned away in anger and unbelief. Event: I met Mary. God: She was a Christian. And because I loved her instantly, I acted like I believed, especially around her. Event: Mary left me. God: After 12 years, she had enough. She wanted the husband she thought she married, not the one who was constantly criticizing her. I was shocked and devastated. Event: I surrendered my life to Jesus. God: Her leaving forced me to look in the mirror. I didn't like what I saw. I dropped to my knees and asked God to forgive me and change me. Event: I was baptized. God: As I’ve become more and more aware of His presence in my life, I wanted to go public with my faith. So, I enrolled to be baptized. I invited Mary, my parents, my friends and coworkers. They watched as I told my story and went under the water. God used that day to warm Mary’s heart toward me. We got back together and… You’re telling the group where you were, the role God played (or didn’t play) in your life, what happened next, and you’re allowing them to understand the journey you’ve been on. “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28 Step 3. Close with "Here's Where I Am Today" End with a short, honest statement about where you are right now — not where you hope to be, not where you were ten years ago. Right now. A few examples: "I've been a faithful follower of Jesus for years, but telling my personal stuff to you guys feels awkward. I want to lean in, but I'm uncertain. I'm going to need your help and encouragement." "I've grown in my faith, but not as much as I wish I had. This much reading is going to be a challenge, but I love Jesus and I'm willing to give it my best shot." "I've gotten involved in this mentoring thing and I'm not sure what I have to give. I don't feel worthy, but I'm in, and I want God to use me." Best Practices A few things to keep in mind as you shape and deliver your story: Give insight into your heart, not just details about your life. Feelings, fears, beliefs — not just facts. Clarify where you are in your faith journey today. Not the highlight reel. The truth. Let the group know how they can pray for you or support you. Share the events that actually shaped your beliefs. Family dynamics, adolescent markers, moving into the real world, your career, your family — with the significant moments sprinkled throughout. Trust the group with what you normally protect. That's where the real connection happens. Our group will rise and fall on how transparent we're willing to be with each other. God tends to do His best work when we stop performing and start bearing our souls — sharing the good, the bad, and the ugly. Be bold. Be brave. Tell the real story, so the group can see the great work God has done in you.rm

Paul Durbin

Lead Pastor

Currently Reading
November 6, 2026 • 6 Minute Read
Community
This is our first real working meeting. We'll share where life's been since Kickoff, your mentor will tell his full faith story, we'll recite our memory verses, and we'll dig into the book and homework on community. Here's how to prepare and what to expect. A quick word from Regi Campbell, the founder of Radical Mentoring, to set the tone: "Intentionality, over time, leads to isolation." Most of us don't drift into isolation on purpose. We just get busy being responsible — work, family, church, all the things — and before we know it, we're hiding in plain sight. This month is about turning that around. Pre-Work Come ready, and the meeting takes care of itself. 1. Read the Book Read Bo's Café by John Lynch, Bill Thrall, and Bruce McNicol. Prepare a one-page net-out of your big ideas and key insights, and bring a copy for each man in the group. (See the Book Net-Out post if you need a refresher on how to put one together.) Here’s a great line from that book: "None of us ever get fixed. But we can mature in community." 2. Memorize Two Verses Be ready to recite both — keyword, chapter, and verse. We'll build on these every month. Community: Proverbs 27:17 Burden Bearing: Philippians 2:4 3. Personal Assignment — Who Knows You Really? Think through and write down your answers to these questions. Bring them with you. Do you have a plus one — one person who knows everything about you, from your darkest secrets to your greatest accomplishments? If not, why not? Do you have an inner circle — a group of people who will call to ask where you are when you don't show up? Who are they? If not, why not? Is it hard or easy for others to love on you? Why? If asked, "Are you lonely?" while taking a lie detector test, how would you answer What's holding you back from developing deeper community and more intimate relationships? In what ways are you really good at being a friend? Where do you struggle? 4. Additional Assignment This one splits based on your season of life. If you're married — Five Feet for Five Minutes. Starting tomorrow, when you're done with work, go directly to within five feet of your wife and engage her for five minutes. Ask about her day, her plans, what made her happy, what's weighing on her. Just listen — don't try to fix anything. Don't check the mail. Don't even go for the kids first. This is about voting her #1 with your physical presence in the first minutes you're back in her life. Non-sexual touch is fair game. Do it every day and be ready to report back. Best not to tell her what you're doing — but don't be surprised if she figures it out. Keep going either way. If you're single — Obituary. Write the obituary you'd like to see after your death (of old age, by natural causes). Third person, two pages or less. Read a few online if you need to get the hang of it. Bring copies for every mentee and your mentor. Include: Professional, community, church/ministry, and family accomplishments Quotes from three important people in your life A paragraph that opens: "In ___, he participated in a mentoring group. It was significant because…" 5. Growth Partner Get together with your assigned growth partner before the meeting — coffee, breakfast, lunch, whatever works. Here's what to talk about: If you're married: How did Five Feet for Five Minutes go? How did your wife respond? Can you keep it going? If you're single: Does engaging in community come naturally to you, or is it hard? Why do you think that is? Both of you: "Is it hard or easy for others to love on you?" and "If asked, 'Are you lonely?' on a lie detector test, how would you answer?" 6. Pray Keep praying for your mentor and each man in the group. Ask God to reveal more of Himself to you through this season — and to help you grasp the value of having a band of brothers to do life with. Agenda Plan on about three hours. Regroup & Prayer (15 minutes) Quick catch-up on what's been going on in life since Kickoff, one thing you're hoping to get out of this season, and what God's teaching you right now. Then your mentor will open in prayer. Mentor's Faith Story (45 minutes) This is one of the most important moments of the whole year. Your mentor will tell his full story — the real version, not the Sunday School one. Listen well. Next month, at the Story Retreat, it's your turn. Scripture Review (15 minutes) Everyone recites Proverbs 27:17 and Philippians 2:4 — keyword, chapter, and verse. Break (10 minutes) Homework Debrief (40 minutes) Walk through Who Knows You Really? together, then share from Five Feet for Five Minutes (married) or the Obituary (single). Book Discussion (40 minutes) Pass out your Bo's Café net-outs. Each man shares a fresh idea from the book, so we're building on each other instead of repeating the same takeaways. Next Month Preview (5 minutes) Mentor hands out next month's homework and growth partner pairings. Closing Prayer (5 minutes) Mentor prays for each man by name. Look Ahead Next month is our Story Retreat — a 24-hour overnight where each mentee tells his faith story. Your mentor will cover logistics separately. Here's what to prep: Book Becoming a King by Morgan Snyder. Read it and bring a one-page net-out with a copy for each man. Verses Identity: Galatians 2:20 New Creation: 2 Corinthians 5:17 Personal Assignments Choose to Lose — identify something you need to let go of in order to grow. Words That Describe Me — a short exercise naming the words (good and bad) that honestly describe who you are. What Lies Are You Believing? (singles only) — name the lies you've internalized about yourself, God, or life, and the truth that counters each one. Prepare Your Faith Story Start working on your own faith story now so you're ready to share it on the retreat. This Telling Your Faith Story post will help you shape it. Growth Partner New pairing for the month. Get together before the retreat. Pray Keep praying — for your mentor, each man in the group, and for God to do something you'll remember for the rest of your life on the Story Retreat.rm

Paul Durbin

Lead Pastor

November 4, 2026 • 6 Minute Read
What Would You Do If You Knew Time Was Short?
OVERVIEW 👀 In this closing message of the Life Under the Sun series, Pastor Paul Durbin walks us through Ecclesiastes 11-12 and unpacks Solomon's four final words of wisdom: just ship it, invest early, savor the poetry, and fear God. With honesty, humor, and real-life stories, Paul reminds us that God has placed something unique in each of us that the world needs, that saying yes to Jesus early changes everything, that growing older is a gift worth embracing, and that a healthy reverence for God quiets every other fear. It's a call to stop waiting for perfect conditions and start living fully alive to the One who made us. TIPS 📌 For the greatest impact, invite a few others to go through this study guide with you. You don't need to do every section and question—use what fits your group or season. Let the Spirit highlight where to slow down and engage. ICEBREAKER(S) 🧊 If you could go back and give your 20-year-old self one piece of financial or life advice, what would it be? BIBLE PASSAGE(S) 📖 Ecclesiastes 11:1-10 Ecclesiastes 12:1-14 Luke 9:23-25 Hebrews 9:27-28 OBSERVATION 🔎 In Ecclesiastes 11:1-6, what repeated themes or images does Solomon use to describe stepping out in faith despite uncertainty? In Ecclesiastes 12:1-7, what poetic images does Solomon use to describe aging, and what do they communicate about how he views growing older? How does Solomon's conclusion in Ecclesiastes 12:13-14 tie together everything he has been teaching throughout the book? APPLICATION 👋 What is something God has placed in you that you've been holding back from "shipping"? Paul shared how a professor once told him he didn't have what it takes, but he went anyway. Think about a time when you let someone else's doubt hold you back from stepping out in faith. Where in your life are you "watching the wind" or "looking at the clouds"—waiting for perfect conditions before you obey God? Solomon says those who wait for ideal circumstances will never plant and never reap. Consider what "perfect conditions" you might be waiting on. If the days of your life are currency, how are you currently spending them? Paul reminded us that time is one of the most valuable things God has given us. Reflect on whether your calendar matches what you say you value most. What does it look like for you, in this season, to "invest early" in Jesus rather than later? Whether you're 18 or 68, "early" simply means now. Think about one surrender you've been postponing. How do you honestly feel about growing older, and how might God be inviting you to "savor the poetry" of this stage of life? Our culture often pushes us to fight aging rather than embrace it. Consider what it would look like to receive it as a gift instead. What would change in your daily life if your fear of God truly dwarfed every other fear you carry? Paul described the fear of God as deep reverence that aligns our life with His Word. Think about a specific fear that loses its grip when God gets bigger. Are you looking to Jesus for salvation, or are you quietly gambling that you'll figure it out later? Paul closed with a direct invitation to put our trust in Christ now, not someday. This is a chance to answer that question honestly. LIVE ON BELAY 🏔️ Take one concrete step this week toward the dream or calling God has put in you—send the email, make the call, start the project, write the first page. Sit down with your calendar and bank account and ask, "Am I investing my days and dollars in things that matter for eternity?" Make one adjustment. Reach out to an older Belay'er this week and ask them to share a story or lesson from their walk with Jesus—then thank them for it. Share a piece of wisdom or encouragement God has given you with someone younger who could use it. Invite someone who doesn't yet know Jesus to coffee, a meal, or a Sunday at Belay—don't wait for the perfect moment. PRAYER 🙏 Lord, give me the courage to step out in faith and "ship" what You've placed in me. Jesus, help me invest my life—my time, energy, and resources—into Your kingdom instead of my own. Father, teach me to embrace the season of life I'm in and savor the gift of each day. God, grow in me a healthy fear of You that quiets every other fear. Jesus, I put my trust in You today—be my Savior, my King, and my rescue. OUTLINE 📝 Main Idea: Solomon's final words of wisdom call us to step out in faith, surrender our life to Jesus early, embrace the gift of aging, and walk in a reverent fear of God. Just Ship It (Ecclesiastes 11:1-6) You are a one-of-a-kind result of God's creativity, and He's placed things in you that the world needs. Les Brown quote about the graveyard being the richest place on earth—full of unshipped dreams. Paul and Patty's story: van-life ministry after Bible college, moving to China with four kids, planting Belay in Boulder. "Whoever watches the wind will not plant; whoever looks at the clouds will not reap." Stop waiting for perfect conditions—plant the seed, trust God, try again if you fall. Invest Early (Ecclesiastes 11:7-10, Luke 9:23-25) The compound interest illustration: the investor who starts at 25 ends up with more than the one who starts at 35, even investing less. The days of your life are currency—invest them in what lasts. Jesus: whoever loses their life for His sake will save it. Say yes to Jesus now, not "right before you die." Enjoy your youth, but know there's a payoff for every investment you make. Savor the Poetry (Ecclesiastes 12:1-8, Proverbs 16:31) Solomon writes three verses to the young and eight poetic verses to the old—he's tender with aging. Paul's story of seeing the back of his balding head on the big screen in Beijing. The poetic imagery of aging: trembling hands, dim eyes, fading hearing, fear of heights. Gray hair is a crown of glory—don't fight it, embrace it, share your wisdom. Not everyone gets to grow old; it's a gift. Fear God (Ecclesiastes 12:9-14, Hebrews 9:27-28) Paul's hamper jump-scare story—that's not the fear of God. The fear of God is deep reverence that aligns our life with His Word and His ways. A fear of God dwarfs every other fear—opinions, risk, the world. Solomon's final word points to a coming day of judgment. The answer to judgment: Jesus, sacrificed once, returning for those who are waiting for Him. Takeaway: Don't gamble your life—ship what God has put in you, invest early in Jesus, savor the season you're in, and let a reverent fear of God lead you home.

Paul Durbin

Lead Pastor

November 4, 2026 • 4 Minute Read
Kickoff Meeting
The Kickoff Meeting is where we come together for the first time. We'll share a meal, cast vision for the season ahead, review the covenant, and set the calendar for all our sessions. Below is everything you need to know to prepare — and what to expect when you arrive. Pre-Work 1. Review the Covenant Read the Mentee Covenant carefully. This is what you've committed to for the mentoring season, so don't skim it. If you're married, review the covenant with your wife. We want her to understand what you're being asked to do and be fully supportive of the time you'll invest — both in your homework and in your time away with the group. 2. Write a Short Bio Write a short bio and send it to your mentor. He'll share everyone's bios with the group so we can start getting to know each other before we meet. Here’s a simple template: My name is ______. I am ___ years old. (If married: I've been married to ______ for ___ years, and we have ___ children: ______.) I grew up in ______, graduated from ______ with a degree in ______, and spent ___ years working at ______ with ______ responsibilities. I got involved at ______ church in ______, and I accepted Jesus in ______. In my spare time, I like to ______. I'm participating in this process because ______. 3. Prepare Your Calendar During the Kickoff Meeting, we’ll coordinate our calendars for the entire mentoring season (monthly meetings and two retreats). Once these dates are set, they're very hard to change. Take your time and think through any dates you already know you can't meet: vacations, work trips, family reunions, anniversaries, kids' events, special occasions, etc. If you're married, talk through the calendar with your wife so it's family-approved before you arrive. Keep in mind: we'll have to make some calendar compromises to get everyone on the same page. 4. Start Praying Begin praying for your mentor and the other mentees in your group. Ask God to do something spectacular in each of our lives through this mentoring season. Agenda The Kickoff Meeting will last two to three hours. Here's what to expect: Dinner (45 minutes) We'll start by sharing a meal together. While we eat, each person will take a few minutes to share who they are, who's in their immediate family, what they do, and one reason they're excited about this mentoring season. If you have dietary restrictions, let your mentor know ahead of time. Vision for the Season (30 minutes) Your mentor will share his vision for the season — why he's chosen to do this, why it matters, and what he hopes to pour into your lives. Remember: you were prayerfully chosen for this group and that God has something special in store if you'll open yourself up to Him! The group will review “What’s the Vision?” and pray together for the journey ahead. Review the Covenant (15 minutes) You'll review the Mentee Covenant, and the group will go around reading each item aloud. This is a meaningful moment — a reminder that you're committing not just to your mentor and the group, but to God. Set the Calendar (25 minutes) This is one of the most important parts of the night. You'll pull out your calendar and work together to lock in dates for the whole season: First Meeting on Community — next month's regular meeting, where your mentor will tell his full faith story. Story Retreat — a 24-hour overnight experience. Monthly Sessions — ideally a consistent day of the month (e.g., the third Wednesday night), with adjustments for conflicts. Commencement Retreat — your final gathering, likely an overnight retreat, where you'll celebrate the season and send one another out as graduates. Once dates are locked in, your mentor will send everyone the full schedule so there's no confusion. Look Ahead Your mentor will hand out the homework for next month and walk through each piece: Book for next month: Bo's Cafe Obtain your own copy of Bo's Cafe , and bring a net-out to share with the group. Verses for next month: Community: Proverbs 27:17 Burden Bearing: Philippians 2:4 Personal & Relational Assignments Personal assignments relate to each month's topic and are meant to help you grow spiritually. If you're married, you'll also have relational assignments aimed at strengthening your marriage (often involving your wife). Growth Partner: Each month you'll be paired with a different person in the group for a one-on-one connection (coffee, breakfast, lunch, etc.) between meetings. You'll pray for your growth partner daily. Journal: You're strongly encouraged to journal throughout the season. The format doesn't matter — just capture what you're learning.rm

Paul Durbin

Lead Pastor

November 4, 2026 • 3 Minute Read
Mentee Covenant
Mentee Covenant Before you make this covenant, please read this overview page and apply to join Radical Mentoring first. Once you've been accepted into a group, come back to this page to review and make your commitment. I am hereby making a covenant commitment to the following: I desire to be an all-in Jesus-follower, husband (if married), father (if applicable), son, friend, disciple-maker, and leader. I want to grow in my relationship with Jesus and learn to be more like Him. I will take direct, unfiltered feedback and do everything in my power to receive it in love and learn from it. I will avoid defensiveness, realizing that when I defend, I lose the opportunity to learn. I commit to openly examine my personality, past, habits, and responses to people. I commit to attend every meeting and retreat, to be there on time, and to complete all my assigned homework. No exceptions, unless providentially hindered. I understand and agree that I will have to say "no" to important things to meet this commitment, and I am willing to do so. After we lay out our schedule for the year, I will manage my other commitments around the dates we've selected for meetings and retreats. I recognize that my mentor and group will make a significant investment in me. Because it would be unfair and disrespectful to do otherwise, I commit to the entire season and to finish well. I recognize that my mentor pledges to give me the same commitment, dedication, and energy. He will attempt to lead from a humble, transparent, and loving heart. I recognize that this mentoring process is based upon Jesus, His message, and His plan. I will be vulnerable about my relationship with Him, for the purpose of growing my faith. I commit to full confidentiality. What is said in the group stays in the group. This confidentiality does not supersede the law and must never cover up a current or future threat to the health or well-being of another person. I commit to pay it forward by investing in others for spiritual purposes. I will use this time to identify a plan for how I can serve and lead based on my gifts, season of life, and passions. I will be a disciple-maker in whatever way God leads, including potentially leading my own mentoring group. If you're married: I discussed this commitment with my wife, and she fully supports my involvement. She willingly relinquishes the time it will take to attend the meetings and retreats and to do the reading and homework, with the goal of my becoming a godlier man.Complete the Covenantrm

Paul Durbin

Lead Pastor

November 4, 2026 • 4 Minute Read
Book Net-Out
The Net-Out of a Book Each month, we read a book together. The net-out is a one-page document where you summarize what stood out to you — the big ideas, key quotes, and life application. Think of it like casting a wide net over the book to catch what's worth keeping. Why it matters For you: It becomes a resource you can return to for years. Reviewing your net-out should feel like reading the book again. For the group: Someone else may catch something you missed — and vice versa. Sharing your net-out helps everyone grow. How to put one together There's no single "right" way. Some guys write a short summary. Others list page numbers with a sentence or two about why that page mattered. Many use bullet points for key points, quotes, principles, and Scripture references. The net-out is mainly for you — do it in whatever way will be most helpful to you long-term. A few things to keep in mind: You're letting the author mentor you. Read like you're sitting across from someone who knows the subject well. We're all in this together. Everyone puts in the work. Everyone benefits. Keep it to one page. The discipline of boiling it down is part of the value. Bring a copy for each man in the group. This way, everyone walks away with each other's insights — not just your own. What a net-out looks like: Here's a sample based on The Good and Beautiful Life by James Bryan Smith: Thesis: “We live at the mercy of our ideas and narratives.” I want happiness, but do I choose happiness. What is my mind focused on? Do I have the mind of Jesus? Do I choose gratitude? Happiness is conditional based on circumstances. Joy is our inner disposition, immune to external circumstances. The Good & Beautiful Life = Living “This Way of Life” Dallas Willard – Non-Discipleship: Costs us the abundant life Jesus promises us in John 10:10 Jesus’ invitation to “Come – Follow Me” is a daily invitation. Days leads to months, Months leads to years, years leads to a good and beautiful life. Radical truth to remember and return to: I am loved by God, forgiven by God, and raised to a new life in Jesus. Three types of Anger: 1) Visceral: hits us immediately, 2) Meditative: grows over time (both fueled by unmet expectations and fear) and 3) Righteous: getting angry at things that anger God “I will not leave or forsake you” = God doesn’t lose sight of us; God give us space to experiment and grow but doesn’t intrude. Lust = Greek Epithumia = objectifying another person for one’s own gratification (it is a heart issue – responding to our feelings of emptiness) Why we lie: 1) fear of what will happen if we tell the truth, or 2) desire for personal gain Jesus says all our speech should be honest, genuine, true, and trustworthy: Col 3:19: “Do not lie…taken off your old self.” Eph 3:29: “Let no evil come out…so that our words may give grace.” Becoming “more than enough” people = moving from self-centeredness to generosity because there is no fear of coming out short. Kingdom Identity: I am the one in whom Christ Dwells. Kingdom Awareness: I am in the strong and secure Kingdom of God Worry is not the same as being cautious or careful. Worry is what we do after we have planned and prepared. Worry is a disproportionate level of concern based on an inappropriate measure of fear. Worry leads to anxiety – it is impossible to be anxious without being worried. Worry keeps me focused on my unlimited resources – trust keeps my attention on God’s abundant resources. “I am a child of God, in whom Christ dwells and I am living in the unshakable Kingdom of God.” Books We’ll Read Community: Bo's Café: A Novel by John Lynch, Bill Thrall, and Bruce McNicol Identity: Becoming a King by Morgan Snyder Theology: The Good and Beautiful God by James Bryan Smith Grace: The Cure by John Lynch, Bill Thrall, and Bruce McNicol Prayer: A Praying Life by Paul E. Miller Godly Character: Louder Than Words by Andy Stanley Marriage: What Radical Husbands Do by Regi Campbell Sexual Integrity: Sex in a Broken World by Paul David Tripp Priorities: Ordering Your Private World, by Gordon MacDonald Finishing Strong: Finishing Strong by Steve Farrarrm

Paul Durbin

Lead Pastor

November 4, 2026 • 3 Minute Read
Radical Mentoring Overview
What Is Radical Mentoring? Radical Mentoring is a 10-month group mentoring experience where a seasoned Jesus-follower walks alongside a small group of men (4–8) who are a few steps behind him on the journey.Apply Now What Does it Look Like? Each group meets once a month for 2-3 hours, plus two overnight retreats toward the beginning and end of the season. In addition, mentees commit to five simple rhythms: Read a Book. Each month, the mentor assigns a book. Mentees read it and bring a one-page "net-out" — their key takeaways — to share with the group. Memorize Scripture. Two verses a month, tied to that month's topic. Mentees come ready to recite them from memory. Complete a Growth Assignment. Practical homework designed to help mentees grow as Jesus-followers, husbands, fathers, and leaders. They report back at the next meeting. Build Community. Through shared pursuit and honest conversation, authentic friendships form — a band of brothers who challenge and encourage each other. Pray. Mentees pray regularly for their mentor, their group, and themselves — asking God to do something significant over the season.Apply Now What happens at the Monthly Meeting? Regroup & Prayer (15 minutes). A quick catchup to see what God's been doing in each man's life since the last meeting. Scripture Review (15 minutes). Each man recites that month's memory verses. Homework Debrief (40 minutes). The group talks through the month's growth assignment — what they learned, where they struggled, what shifted. Book Takeaways (40 minutes). Each man shares key takeaways from the book, then the group digs into what stood out. Next Month Preview (5 minutes). The mentor previews next month's book, verses, homework, and growth partner pairings. Closing Prayer (5 minutes).Apply Now What's the Vision? By the end of the season, our hope is that every Radical Mentoring “graduate” would: Know God personally with a clear picture of who He is and how He sees them as His adopted son. See God as a perfect Father who loves them immeasurably. Believe God has a unique purpose for their life. Embrace Scripture in a fresh way — memorizing it, recalling it, and applying it. Make intentional choices about time and priorities. Love the Church and stay committed to it. Have God's perspective on money and possessions. Make wise decisions rooted in godly wisdom and good theology. Live as a learner and follower of Jesus — reading, journaling, and growing. Influence their circle — moving the people around them one step closer to Jesus. Pay it forward as an intentional disciple-maker for the next generation.Apply Now The Commitment Radical Mentoring is an all-in experience. Over 10 months, each man commits to: One 3-hour group meeting per month Two overnight retreats (one near the start, one at the end) A book a month — read and summarized before each meeting Two verses a month — memorized and ready to recite A monthly growth assignment — practical homework tied to the month's topic A monthly one-on-one with a rotating "growth partner" from the group. Ready to Take the Next Step? Radical Mentoring isn't for everyone — and that's okay. It's for men who are ready to be all-in for the journey. If that's you, we'd love to hear from you. Fill out a short application, and we'll be in touch to talk through next steps. Not every applicant will be placed in a group this season, but every application is prayerfully considered.Apply Nowrm

Paul Durbin

Lead Pastor

October 29, 2026 • 2 Minute Read
Why the Older Lumberjack Won
Two lumberjacks had a contest. The young one swung his ax all day without stopping. The older one kept disappearing to sit on a stump. At the end of the day, the older man had way more wood. The young one was furious: "You took so many breaks!" The older man grinned. "Those weren't breaks. I was sharpening my ax." Ecclesiastes 10:10 puts it plainly: "If the ax is dull and its edge unsharpened, more strength is needed, but skill will bring success." A lot of us are swinging dull axes. We're exhausted, maxed out, and quietly proud of how hard we're working. But harder isn't always holier. Sometimes the most faithful thing you can do is stop. Pull back. Sit on the stump for a minute. Jesus did this all the time. Luke tells us He often withdrew to lonely places and prayed—not because He was lazy, but because He knew the source of His strength. And then He turns to us in Matthew 11:28 and says, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." That's not a reward for the finished. That's an invitation for the tired. So what does sharpening look like for you this week? Maybe it's a real Sabbath. Maybe it's thirty minutes with your Bible instead of your phone. Maybe it's a walk with Jesus and nothing to prove. Sharpen the ax. Then swing.

Paul Durbin

Lead Pastor

October 25, 2026 • 7 Minute Read
What Are You Holding That You Can't Keep?
OVERVIEW 👀 In this message from the Life Under the Sun series in Ecclesiastes 9–10, Pastor Paul Durbin walks us through Solomon's honest look at life on planet earth—where no one escapes death, hard work doesn't always win the day, and a little folly can spoil a whole lot of good. Paul reminds us that life is hevel, a vapor we can't grasp, and the wisest thing we can do is trade what we can't keep for what we can never lose. Along the way, he shares the stories of Officer Eric Talley, Philip Henry, and Jim Elliot, and lands on three takeaways: work as an act of worship, live like purity is worth it, and move forward with a sharp ax. TOPICS wisdom, work & vocation, holiness, rest & sabbath, calling & purpose TIPS 📌 For the greatest impact, invite a few others to go through this study guide with you. You don't need to do every section and question—use what fits your group or season. Let the Spirit highlight where to slow down and engage. ICEBREAKER(S) 🧊 If you were given a brand new ax and told to chop wood all day, would you be the "swing harder" person or the "sharpen first" person? Be honest. What's the strangest food combo you've actually enjoyed? (Bonus points if it would make a Boulder Black Bear Breakfast Brownie jealous.) If someone put up a historical plaque about your life 100 years from now, what single sentence would you want on it? BIBLE PASSAGE(S) 📖 Ecclesiastes 9:1-18 Ecclesiastes 10:1-20 OBSERVATION 🔎 In Ecclesiastes 9:1-6, how does Solomon describe the shared destiny of all people, and what does he say sets the living apart from the dead? Ecclesiastes 9:7-10 shifts from the reality of death to instructions about how to live. What specific things does Solomon tell us to do, and what tone do you notice? In Ecclesiastes 10:1 and 10:10, Solomon uses two vivid pictures—dead flies in perfume and a dull ax. What point is he making with each image? APPLICATION 👋 Paul opened by sharing about Officer Eric Talley, saying that in the grand scheme of things, Eric didn't lose. Where in your life right now are you tempted to measure "winning" and "losing" the way the world does instead of the way Jesus does? Think about this quote: "He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose." What's one thing you're gripping tightly that you honestly can't keep anyway? Paul said God actually takes pleasure in your pleasure—sunsets, carrot cake, marriage, color. Where have you believed the lie that enjoying life is somehow unspiritual? This isn't about ignoring God's boundaries; it's about receiving His good gifts with gratitude. Paul challenged the idea that giving Jesus your all must mean becoming a pastor or missionary. If God has called you to be a teacher, entrepreneur, parent, or tradesperson, how are you doing at seeing that work as worship? Many of us compartmentalize Sunday from Monday without realizing it. "As dead flies give perfume a bad smell, so a little folly outweighs wisdom and honor." What's the "scoop of scat" in your life right now—the small, hidden sin you've convinced yourself isn't a big deal? This question isn't meant to shame you; it's meant to free you. Paul said sometimes we can't discern God's will because we're holding onto something we won't lay down. Is there a decision you've been praying about where the clarity might come from surrender rather than more information? The older lumberjack won because he sharpened his ax. What does "sharpening your ax" need to look like in this season—rest, Sabbath, time with Jesus, time off, counseling, prayer? Many of us keep swinging a dull blade and calling it faithfulness. LIVE ON BELAY 🏔️ Pick one everyday task this week—answering emails, folding laundry, writing a report, driving carpool—and silently offer it to Jesus before you start. Notice what changes in how you do it. Reach out to someone in a "regular" job (teacher, nurse, tradesperson, barista) and encourage them that what they do matters to God and to the people they serve. Name one small compromise you've been carrying and confess it to a trusted Belay'er this week. Light kills what darkness feeds. Block out one real Sabbath window on your calendar in the next seven days—no work, no hustle. Use the time to pray, walk, rest, or simply enjoy what God has given you. Think of one person in your orbit who feels forgotten or unseen. Do something small and specific for them this week—a note, a coffee, a meal—just like the poor wise man who saved the city. PRAYER 🙏 Jesus, help me loosen my grip on what I can't keep so I can receive what I can never lose. Father, show me where I've been treating my work as drudgery instead of worship, and give me new eyes for it. Lord, surface the hidden things in my life. Give me courage to lay them down fully, not partially. Spirit, teach me how to sharpen my ax—how to rest, abide, and work from strength instead of fumes. Jesus, make me the kind of person who quietly makes a difference, even if no one remembers my name. WORSHIP 🙌 OUTLINE 📝 Main Idea: The wisest way to live under the sun is to trade what we cannot keep for what we cannot lose. Opening Stories Officer Eric Talley—faith, family, and a sacrifice that saved lives at King Soopers Philip Henry (300 years ago) and Jim Elliot (1949): "He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose" The Hebrew word hevel—vapor, breath, smoke—we can't grasp it Peter's reminder that our inheritance can never perish, spoil, or fade (1 Peter 1:3-4) Setting the Context Life Under the Sun series in Ecclesiastes Solomon isn't describing how life should be, but how life actually is Reading through Ecclesiastes 9 and 10 together Observations from the Text Nobody escapes death—100% terminal But the living have hope—we can still choose, still surrender "God has already approved what you do"—God takes pleasure in your pleasure The race isn't always to the swift—God gives abilities, opens doors, goes before us The poor wise man who saved the city—our accomplishments are easily forgotten Dead flies in perfume—a little folly outweighs wisdom and honor Money "answers everything"—Solomon describing reality, not endorsing it Work as an Act of Worship We tend to split "spiritual life" from "work life" Ecclesiastes 9:10—whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might 2 Corinthians 5:9-10 and Colossians 3:17, 23-24 If God has called you to be a king, don't stoop to be a pastor Turn the world upside down in the realm God has placed you Live Like Purity Is Worth It Shared destiny can tempt us to shrug off holiness Dead flies in perfume—Boulder Black Bear Breakfast Brownies illustration Jesus never called us to partial surrender (Matthew 16:24-26) Romans 12:1-2—offer your bodies as a living sacrifice Clarity about God's will often follows surrender, not precedes it Move Forward with a Sharp Ax Ecclesiastes 10:10—skill brings success The lumberjack story—"I was sharpening my ax" Jesus withdrew to lonely places (Luke 5:16) Matthew 11:28-30—come to Me and I will give you rest Rest and reliance on Jesus are also acts of worship Takeaway: Give what you can't keep. Live pure. Keep your ax sharp. And trust Jesus with the rest.

Paul Durbin

Lead Pastor

October 14, 2026 • 5 Minute Read
Ministry Alignments
Our Aim For those involved in ministry at Belay, we aim for strong and substantial agreement in seven key areas. These areas of alignment exist to protect our unity, maintain biblical integrity, and ensure a healthy ministry culture at Belay. I appeal to you, brothers and sisters, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another in what you say and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be perfectly united in mind and thought (1 Cor. 1:10, NIV). 1. Belief Alignment We affirm and uphold ten core doctrines of the Christian faith as revealed in Holy Scripture (2 Timothy 3:16–17):10 Essential Topics 2. Mission Alignment We align with Belay's Vision, Mission, and Values (Habakkuk 2:2):Vision, Mission, & Values 3. Lifestyle Alignment We commit to living in a way (both in person and online) that reflects our relationship with Christ. Our lives are marked by the following qualities that spell out LIFESTYLE: Love. We reflect Christ's love with compassion, grace, and respect for everyone — refraining from gossip, slander, profanity, and divisive language (John 13:34–35; Ephesians 4:29–32). Integrity. We live lives of consistent, humble integrity that are above reproach (1 Timothy 6:11–16). Faithfulness. We're faithful to attend weekend worship and committed to life together as a Belay family. (Hebrews 10:19–25; Acts 2:42). Eagerness to Learn. We're humble and teachable, open to correction, and accountable to godly authority (Proverbs 12:1; James 4:6). Sexual Purity. We honor God with our bodies, saving sex for marriage, steer clear of pornography, don't live together before we're married, and dress modestly rather than provocatively. (1 Thessalonians 4:3–5; 1 Peter 3:3–4). Truth. We're rooted in God's Word and committed to biblical truth without compromise (2 Timothy 3:16–17). Yielded to Christ. As we yield to Christ, our speech, habits, relationships, and online presence are transformed. We refrain from gambling, tobacco, illegal or recreational drugs, and drunkenness, living as a new creation in Christ (Galatians 5:19–26; Ephesians 5:15–20). Learning Christ. We grow in our relationship with Jesus through a consistent, personal devotional life marked by various spiritual disciplines: prayer, worship, Bible reading, fasting, etc. (Luke 5:16; Psalm 1:1–3, Ephesians 4:17–24). Engaged in Mission. We live on mission (on belay) every day, because we have a deep desire to see people follow Jesus, and grow in their relationship with Him. (Matthew 28:19–20; Mark 10:43–45). Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind (Romans 12:1–2, NIV). 4. Stance Alignment We hold the following stances: Human Identity. We believe that God creates each person with an immutable biological sex—male or female—that reflects the image and likeness of God (Genesis 1:26–27; Matthew 19:4). Marriage and Sexuality. We believe that God designed marriage to be a unique, covenantal relationship joining one man and one woman in a single, exclusive, lifelong union. We believe sexual intimacy is a good gift from God and is intended only within that union (1 Corinthians 6:9–11; Romans 1:24–27). Sanctity of Life. We believe that all human life is sacred and endowed by God with inherent dignity. Therefore, human life must be respected and protected from the moment of conception to natural death (Psalm 139:13–16; Jeremiah 1:5). Women in Ministry. We believe God calls and equips both women and men to serve, lead, and teach in the church according to their gifts. We affirm an egalitarian view of church leadership, where women may serve in any role consistent with their calling and character (Galatians 3:28). 5. Culture Alignment We commit to creating a culture that protects our witness, strengthens our unity, and reflects Christ to those we serve. Our convictions include: Alcohol-Free Environments. To protect those who may struggle with addiction, we commit to fostering alcohol-free environments at all church-related gatherings and events. Even if it’s on our “own time,” we refrain from posting images or content on social media that depict the consumption or promotion of alcohol (Romans 14:13-15; Matthew 22:37-40). Racial Unity & Biblical Identity. We affirm that all people are created in the image of God and share equal worth and dignity. Any ideology that elevates race or ethnicity above identity in Christ is contrary to Scripture (Colossians 3:11; Ephesians 2:14–18). Reconciliation & Forgiveness. When disagreements arise, we commit to working them out according to Jesus's teachings—going directly to the person, speaking with humility, and extending the same forgiveness we've received in Christ (Matthew 5:23–26; Matthew 18:15–35). 6. Role Alignment We understand that ministry roles are not permanent assignments and that occasional adjustments help us stay aligned with changing ministry needs. If leadership believes a role change would be best, they will communicate with transparency and grace about the transition (Hebrews 13:17; Ephesians 4:11–13). Likewise, if we feel led to step away from a role or pursue something different, we simply reach out to leadership for a conversation, and they graciously release us to pursue our next step (1 Peter 4:10–11). 7. Accountability Alignment We remain open to ongoing development and feedback from Belay leadership. If questions or concerns arise regarding these alignments, we contact leadership for clarification and guidance. If we no longer have strong and substantial agreement with the above alignments, we work together with Belay leadership to prayerfully determine next steps. Furthermore, if Belay leadership has reason to believe we no longer walk in strong and substantial agreement with these alignments, they will reach out and work with us to prayerfully determine next steps. Ready to serve? If you've prayerfully read through the above alignments and have strong and substantial agreement with them, please click below to express that agreement and take the next step toward ministry at Belay.Express My Agreementplaybook

Paul Durbin

Lead Pastor